More on Badnarik

There’s more on the whole Badnarik/Hacker dustup on Third Party Watch. Git on over and check it out.

The best part was, in my estimation, Paulie’s comment. Read it after the jump.

IMMEDIATE ATTENTION NEEDED :
HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL

FROM: LOTT DUFFER
DEAR SIR / MADAM,

I AM LOTT DUFFER, Cousin of Allen Hacker, AND CURRENTLY SERVING AS PRESIDENT OF Particulate Campaigns. THIS LETTER MIGHT SURPRISE YOU BECAUSE WE HAVE NOT MET NEITHER IN PERSON NOR BY CORRESPONDENCE. I CAME TO KNOW OF YOU IN MY SEARCH FOR A RELIABLE AND REPUTABLE PERSON TO HANDLE A VERY CONFIDENTIAL BUSINESS TRANSACTION, WHICH INVOLVES THE TRANSFER OF A HUGE SUM OF MONEY TO AN ACCOUNT REQUIRING MAXIMUM CONFIDENCE.

I AM WRITING YOU IN ABSOLUTE CONFIDENCE PRIMARILY TO SEEK YOUR ASSISTANCE IN ACQUIRING campaign FUNDS THAT ARE PRESENTLY TRAPPED on a moon of Jupiter. MY PARTNERS AND I SOLICIT YOUR ASSISTANCE IN COMPLETING A TRANSACTION BEGUN BY MY Cousin, WHO HAS LONG BEEN ACTIVELY ENGAGED IN THE EXTRACTION OF Cash IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, AND BRAVELY SERVED HIS party AS DIRECTOR OF THE Badnarik for Congress Campaign.

IN THE year 2006, MY Cousin, THEN Campaign Manager for Badnarik, SOUGHT TO Bring Freedom to Planet Earth for Ten Thousand Years. THIS UNSUCCESSFUL VENTURE WAS SOON FOLLOWED BY A FALLING OUT WITH HIS former lover Mike Nelson, WHO went on to single handedly sabotage the Badnarik for Congress Campaign and bring on the ten thousand year reign of the Dark Lord Pizuzu.

MY Cousin then SECURED THE campaign ASSETS on his secret Jupiter Moon Base. BUT MY Cousin’S FORMER Lover Mike Nelson was given CONTROL OF THE REPUBLIC OF America by the Dark Lord Pizuzu in return for betraying the People of Earth.

MY FAMILY IS CALLING FOR YOUR URGENT ASSISTANCE IN FUNDING THE REMOVAL OF THE Lord Pizuzu and his vassal Mike Nelson, whom he has made immortal. AS COMPENSATION FOR THE COSTS OF REMOVING them FROM POWER and re-aquiring the campaign funds from the Jupiter Moon Base we will need a good faith deposit of 200 BILLION DOLLARS, BOTH IN THE INITIAL ACQUISITION AND IN LONG-TERM MANAGEMENT.

WITHOUT THE FUNDS FROM OUR 2006 Campaign for Congress, WE WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO ACQUIRE THE Planet held captive by alien reptiles. THAT IS WHY MY FAMILY AND OUR COLLEAGUES ARE URGENTLY SEEKING YOUR GRACIOUS ASSISTANCE. OUR DISTINGUISHED COLLEAGUES IN THIS BUSINESS TRANSACTION INCLUDE THE SITTING VICE-PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, RICHARD CHENEY, WHO IS AN ORIGINAL secret PARTNER IN THE Badnarik for Congress Campaign, AND CONDOLEEZA RICE, WHOSE PROFESSIONAL DEDICATION TO THE VENTURE WAS DEMONSTRATED IN THE NAMING OF A Major Texas University and a Chinese Food Staple AFTER HER.

I WOULD BESEECH YOU TO TRANSFER A SUM EQUALING TEN TO TWENTY-FIVE PERCENT (10-25 %) OF YOUR YEARLY INCOME TO OUR ACCOUNT TO AID IN THIS IMPORTANT VENTURE. THE Bank of Nigeria WILL FUNCTION AS OUR TRUSTED INTERMEDIARY. I PROPOSE THAT YOU MAKE THIS TRANSFER BEFORE THE FIFTEENTH (15TH) OF THE MONTH OF December.

I KNOW THAT A TRANSACTION OF THIS MAGNITUDE WOULD MAKE ANYONE APPREHENSIVE AND WORRIED. BUT I AM ASSURING YOU THAT ALL WILL BE WELL AT THE END OF THE DAY. A BOLD STEP TAKEN SHALL NOT BE REGRETTED, I ASSURE YOU. PLEASE DO BE INFORMED THAT THIS BUSINESS TRANSACTION IS 100% LEGAL. IF YOU DO NOT WISH TO CO-OPERATE IN THIS TRANSACTION, PLEASE Put your head in the oven and shut the door tight.

I PRAY THAT YOU UNDERSTAND OUR PLIGHT. MY FAMILY AND OUR COLLEAGUES WILL BE FOREVER GRATEFUL. PLEASE REPLY IN STRICT CONFIDENCE TO THE CONTACT NUMBERS BELOW.

SINCERELY WITH WARM REGARDS,

Lott Duffer